00;00;03;23 – 00;00;32;00
Lauren Brollier Newton
Welcome to the abundant coach. I’m your host, Lauren Brollier Newton. This is a weekly podcast about creating full spectrum success with a thriving coaching business, while making a profound difference in the world. Each week, you’ll discover insights, strategies, and inspiration to help you attract your ideal clients. Facilitate real transformation in their lives, and grow your coaching business while living your purpose with true freedom and fulfillment.
00;00;32;02 – 00;00;59;23
Lauren Brollier Newton
Welcome to the Abundance Coach! So today, what a great, great topic for today. A very, When I say sentimental, I mean it in the best way. Like, why are we here? Type episode? Because today’s topic is the secret to a meaningful life. How to use the skills you already have for impact. I’m going to start this episode like I do with these, solo episodes with a quote.
00;00;59;25 – 00;01;27;13
Lauren Brollier Newton
And the quote is, you know how every once in a while you do something and the little voice inside says, there. That’s it. That’s why you’re here. And you get a warm glow in your heart because you know it’s true. Do more of that. And that’s a Jacob Norby quote, you know, speaking of impact secret, speaking of a meaningful life skills you already have.
00;01;27;15 – 00;01;50;16
Lauren Brollier Newton
I read that Jacob Norby quote years probably years before I met Mary Morrissey, and it caused me to wake up something inside myself. And Jacob Norby, unless he’s listening to this podcast or someone sends us to him, will never know that he impacted my life to such a great level because he created that quote and put it online.
00;01;50;18 – 00;02;22;17
Lauren Brollier Newton
He won’t know. And so this episode is about what it what causes someone to have a meaningful life. What is a way that you can use the skills you already have to create more impact and more meaning? And, it’s going to be both meaningful to use that word, spiritual and strategic as we always do. But I think it’s so nice for us to really lean into this and really take a pause and think more about the meaning in our life.
00;02;22;20 – 00;02;49;00
Lauren Brollier Newton
So this is reminding me of a, a Raymond Moody book. Raymond Moody, studied near-death experiences. He was a psychiatrist. He was a philosopher. And he wrote the book Life After Life. I’m going to summarize now, this is not, quote, word for word. I’m going to summarize what I took from his work. And, you do with it what you will or you can study his work moving forward.
00;02;49;03 – 00;03;11;28
Lauren Brollier Newton
First of all, nobody was really talking about life after death when Raymond Moody was on the scene. I mean, obviously, let me let me take that back. Life after death. Yes. Jesus talked about it. Many people talked about it. But in the way that he was talking about near-death experiences and how something that happens in a near-death experience can actually show us what that life after death might look like.
00;03;11;28 – 00;03;31;14
Lauren Brollier Newton
People weren’t on a scientific level talking about that before Raymond Moody came on the scene. So remember, Moody studies near-death experiences, and he notices a pattern that, first and foremost, most people who have a near-death experience, whether they tried to commit suicide or they got in a car accident or they’re just old or they’re having a heart attack.
00;03;31;16 – 00;03;59;05
Lauren Brollier Newton
Those people who die and come back most report having an experience of seeing themselves on the table or on the death scene, like they’re out of their body and they’re looking down at themselves. Then they have an experience of seeing a bright light. What a religious person might describe it as God or consciousness or whatever. And then seeing some sort of a life review where they’re reviewing moments in their life up until now.
00;03;59;08 – 00;04;26;02
Lauren Brollier Newton
Now, it didn’t matter what religion these people were or what was the cause of them to die at almost and come back to life. But he said, of all these people in the life review, the thing that they all had in common was they were realizing that in these moments of life review what had happened in this lifetime, that they were asked to look at places where they turned toward love or away from love, and they turned toward growth or away from growth.
00;04;26;02 – 00;04;48;21
Lauren Brollier Newton
And that was what mattered love and growth. And so if you think about that in terms of creating a meaningful life, love and growth, I ultimately felt so resonant with Raymond Moody’s work because I can really deeply say that that resonates, that we’re here for love and we’re here for growth, and we can feel it inside of us.
00;04;48;21 – 00;05;10;15
Lauren Brollier Newton
When Jacob Norby says, you can feel that within you. When I think about, am I here because I want to love more? Yes, because I want to grow more? Yes. Do I always feel good and warm when I’m in those type of activities? Yes. When I turn away from love, when I turn toward separateness, when I turn away from growth, does that feel good?
00;05;10;17 – 00;05;37;07
Lauren Brollier Newton
No. Ultimately. And so if that’s what meaning comes from love and growth, there are an infinite number of ways to create that. Yes. Your coaching business, of course. And I think that’s really a great guide for our businesses is my business, one that’s filled with love for everybody that I have the privilege of serving. And am I causing myself and those people that are being coached by me to grow?
00;05;37;09 – 00;05;58;23
Lauren Brollier Newton
Those are things that you can do with any level of skill, with any personality. You are capable of that right now, right where you are. I think about, you know, going back to this idea that I’ve, I’ve loved this Jacob Norby quote forever. He’ll likely never know that impact. I want to encourage you to be yourself, because the topic of this episode is the meaning for life.
00;05;58;24 – 00;06;20;29
Lauren Brollier Newton
How to use the skill you already have. And I believe the greatest skill you have is being you. I’ll never forget one time I have a tradition of going to Disneyland with my family, especially my dad, because sometimes my mom, she wasn’t as big a Disney freaks as a freak as we were. So she would say, you guys go, you know, because we wanted to go like five times a year.
00;06;21;02 – 00;06;49;00
Lauren Brollier Newton
And I remember one time I was at Disney Go with my dad. I was a teenager, probably 17 or 18 years old, and I was there with my dad. We were waiting in line to go on the Disneyland Railroad, which is just a very scenic, boring trip on this railroad train around the park. And there was this mom standing in line, and she had a son that I don’t know what was occurring in their family, but if I had to guess, I might say that the son was likely autistic and they were waiting for the train.
00;06;49;03 – 00;07;18;29
Lauren Brollier Newton
And, you could tell that she was caretaking for him. Like he wouldn’t have been able to be at Disneyland alone. And she was waiting for the train. And the train came and she said, you know, my son really loves to ride the train that has the front facing seats. And so we will wait for that one. And the conductor said, well, you know, we put trains in the track in a certain order and that train won’t get on the track for probably another 40 minutes.
00;07;19;01 – 00;07;36;15
Lauren Brollier Newton
She said, that’s okay. We’ll wait for it because that’s his favorite train. And the conductor said, well, great. When he when we get that train on the track, would your son like to, you know, come see the conductor and sit up at the front. And the mom got teary eyed and she said, oh my gosh, that would make our day.
00;07;36;17 – 00;07;53;03
Lauren Brollier Newton
And it bring tears to my eyes every time I think of that story. Every time my dad and I talk about it, we both get teary eyed. The reason we get teary eyed is because we said to each other that mom would have sat on that train and her son was not a young man. He if I would guess he was probably in his 30s.
00;07;53;05 – 00;08;10;24
Lauren Brollier Newton
That is a young man. But he wasn’t like a child that he wasn’t like 7 or 8 years old. He was probably in his 30s and she was willing to sit there. She my dad and I said, that woman would have sat there all day if it meant her son riding that train that he likes to ride. This was probably close to 20 years ago.
00;08;10;24 – 00;08;38;01
Lauren Brollier Newton
Now, and you can see from my emotion that every time I think about this story, I feel emotional because she showed so much love and care and commitment to this child of hers that seemed to me like he maybe couldn’t speak or had a lot of challenges. And she took care of him, and she showed so much love and selflessness in this act of taking this kid to Disneyland.
00;08;38;01 – 00;08;58;07
Lauren Brollier Newton
She’d probably been doing it for 30 years already and was going to sit there all day, if that’s what it took to get him on the train that he wanted to ride. I share this story with you today because she created so much meaning in her own life, I’m sure. But now in my life, a woman she’s never met will never meet.
00;08;58;07 – 00;09;24;22
Lauren Brollier Newton
I don’t know who she was. I was I saw her life for ten minutes and 20 years later, I’m still teary eyed because I’m so impressed with the display of love that I had the privilege of witnessing. And even more special, I got to witness it with my dad and I will never forget that. Meaning can come from simply being who you are.
00;09;24;24 – 00;09;46;25
Lauren Brollier Newton
She will never know the meaning that she’s had in my life. Maybe her son will never be able to verbally tell her the meaning that she’s had in his life, but just by being her, she created meaning that went far and is now going to go to the thousands of you that listen to this podcast. And we don’t even know her name.
00;09;46;28 – 00;10;16;01
Lauren Brollier Newton
And I share this to share with you. Not to underestimate the meaning that you do have with who you are right now. Even if you don’t have a thousand social media followers or there’s crickets on your posts you don’t know, or 100 people come to your workshop and only a couple people enrolled in clients, you will never know many of the names of the people who actually see you, many of the names of the people that you actually are helping.
00;10;16;03 – 00;10;42;08
Lauren Brollier Newton
And I encourage you as a coach to not wait until you get the accolades or the big followership or anybody telling you that they even listen to it, to tell yourself and to know deep, deep in your heart that you do have meaning and you do have purpose. And that doesn’t come from the number of people. It doesn’t even in some ways come from the role that you’re playing as a coach.
00;10;42;10 – 00;11;07;26
Lauren Brollier Newton
That meaning comes from meaning comes from you being you fully. There’s a Rumi quote, and this is not a direct quote from Rumi. This is a translation. I’ll say it that way. My recollection of the Rumi quote as passed down by Mary Morrissey from Rumi. So it’s been it’s been iterated a couple times, but it’s still the essence of it comes from Rumi and it goes like this.
00;11;07;29 – 00;11;36;17
Lauren Brollier Newton
It’s as if a king has sent you from afar in distant land to do one specific task. You could do a thousand other things while you’re here, but if you don’t do the one thing for which he sent you, it’s going to feel as if you’ve done nothing. Now, let me break this down in the way that Mary Morrissey breaks it down, says as if a king.
00;11;36;17 – 00;11;53;00
Lauren Brollier Newton
The grand overall design, or the creator of the universe has sent you from a far distant land. Nobody wakes up on planet Earth and goes, oh yeah, I know how to do this human life thing. Like, no, all of us are discombobulated as hell. Like, what are we all doing here? And do I have meaning? And you know, what is my purpose?
00;11;53;02 – 00;12;08;04
Lauren Brollier Newton
Does it this King ascension from a far distant land to do one specific task? You could do a thousand other things while you’re here. But if you don’t do that one thing, it’s going to feel like you’ve done nothing. Well, that one thing isn’t be a coach. Be a teacher, be a lawyer, be a mom, be a doctor.
00;12;08;06 – 00;12;34;14
Lauren Brollier Newton
It’s be you. Because there’s only one of you and the whole history of the universe and the whole future. There’s only one, and that’s you. And if you don’t do the thing for which he sent you, which is becoming a fuller expression of you, it is going to feel like you’ve done nothing. Many of you, I know, have barely scratched the surface of letting the world see who you really are.
00;12;34;17 – 00;13;09;23
Lauren Brollier Newton
And maybe you’re saying to yourself, but I don’t even know who I really am. Yes you do, yes you do. And the thing that you probably don’t know is that that is okay. Whoever that is. So why does this have to do with your coaching business? Your impact is going to come from your willingness to become the fuller and fuller and even more fuller and more fuller expressed version of yourself, and that the meaning comes from being you, from writing the quote that Jacob Norby wrote, from being the mom who would wait all day to ride this train that she wants to ride with her son.
00;13;10;00 – 00;13;29;02
Lauren Brollier Newton
That’s where meaning comes from. That’s where your impact is going to come from as a coach. If you’re hiding, if you’re masking yourself, if you’re afraid of putting yourself out there, yeah, you’re not going to have very much impact or very much meaning because you’ve literally told yourself that you can’t do the one thing for which you were sent here, which is be yourself.
00;13;29;04 – 00;13;48;02
Lauren Brollier Newton
So who are you? Some of you are still discovering that because you think as a coach, you have to be some sort of marketing strategy or brand or this or that? Could you just be you, please that is the brand. Now, if you’re wondering what your existing strengths are, because the title of this is use the skills you already have, they don’t have to be coaching or business skills.
00;13;48;02 – 00;14;12;16
Lauren Brollier Newton
That’s the thing that you guys all get tripped up over sometimes is who are you? What do you love? If you love cocktails, I love Lucy, okay, I’m kind of talking about myself now, but cocktails, I Love Lucy and studying personal development. There’s your brand. Like, use that skill. Okay, so you’ve got humor, you’ve got a little edge to you.
00;14;12;16 – 00;14;39;08
Lauren Brollier Newton
You’re going to go out, you’re going to have a cocktail. And you love personal development. There’s your brand. There’s who you are, there’s your skill. You’re real right. Or if you’re the person who’s like, I love analyzing things down to minute detail, you can use that skill in your coaching business, okay? Analyze everything down to such a detail that people have a step by step list of exactly what to do.
00;14;39;10 – 00;15;04;18
Lauren Brollier Newton
And I like I said, I don’t care if it seems like a coaching skill or not. It doesn’t even have to be something you’re good at. I think that trips us up. It’s like, who are you? What do you like? What are you afraid of? What? What floats your boat and what ticks you off? Because everything that you’ve learned to navigate, all those things, to let yourself love, all those things, those can be a part of what you help other people do.
00;15;04;21 – 00;15;28;01
Lauren Brollier Newton
They can absolutely be a part of what you help other people do. I didn’t know being a fourth grade teacher would help me be a great coach. But one thing I learned being a fourth grade teacher is that your lesson always has an objective, and that should be clear, and you’re going to share the same point three different ways to illustrate what you’re trying to teach.
00;15;28;04 – 00;15;50;09
Lauren Brollier Newton
Because people have such different learning levels that if they hear it three different ways, they’re going to be able to better understand it, grok it, whatever you want to say. Okay, I wanted to be a teacher because I wanted to help kids. I didn’t know that all those skills were going to transfer to this career. And so there’s skills that you think, well, that’s not a skill because I’m over here doing this.
00;15;50;10 – 00;16;11;15
Lauren Brollier Newton
Yes, it is a skill. Everything that you do is a skill, especially if you’re a life coach. Holy smokes for life. If you’ve done anything in life, you have skills. And so you really want to get over this myth of not enoughness. And I don’t have any skills. Yes you do, yes you do. I’m going to tell you right now I’m a new mom.
00;16;11;15 – 00;16;33;08
Lauren Brollier Newton
If you’re a mom, you’ve got some mad skills. Okay? So whatever skills you have, do know that that is what’s going to create meaning and that’s what’s going to create impact. Stop trying to be something. Be you. That’s the perfect brand. That’s the perfect level of skill to be able to help people. You can learn how to form that into curriculum or what to teach and all that.
00;16;33;08 – 00;16;53;07
Lauren Brollier Newton
I mean, that’s why there’s certifications like what we have, but what we can’t teach you is how to be you. If we go back to the Raymond Moody idea that everything is about in this life, time is about love and is about growth. And I think you could run every religion in the world and every spiritual affiliation in the world through that lens and find truth.
00;16;53;09 – 00;17;23;14
Lauren Brollier Newton
Then I believe that meaning comes from both service, because love is really service, right? If you’re being of love, it doesn’t mean you’re being a doormat, by the way. But if you’re being love, if you’re being the expression of love, then that’s serving others somehow. And if you’re growing, then you’re serving yourself in a good way, because growth feels amazing to look back and not be in the same place you were a year ago or two years ago.
00;17;23;17 – 00;17;43;14
Lauren Brollier Newton
So isn’t it all about service in the end, serving our own self and serving others, you know, give what you already have. I believe that that is the fastest way to feel meaning is give what you already have and you have so much. If you binge watch Netflix last night, you got a recommendation to give someone you know.
00;17;43;16 – 00;18;05;10
Lauren Brollier Newton
So give what you have and use all the skills that you’ve amassed over the time that you’ve been on this planet to serve the people that you are setting out to serve. I think the first step is acknowledging that you do have skills. The second step is to ask yourself, how may I use these skills to serve others?
00;18;05;12 – 00;18;21;27
Lauren Brollier Newton
And then the third step is to do it because it’s not enough to just think it, to dream it up, to know something about it, to kind of have this idea put your money where your mouth is, right, do the thing. Let me give you a very concrete example of this, because I know you don’t love it when I don’t give you an example.
00;18;21;27 – 00;18;42;11
Lauren Brollier Newton
So I said, you got to acknowledge the skills that you have. You have to ask the question, what? How could I put these to use? And then you have to do it. So let’s say that you spent years as a piano teacher. You’ve been a mom, a piano teacher, a wife. You’ve had some struggles. Maybe you’re divorced and you really want a coach, but you just are like, I don’t have any skills.
00;18;42;11 – 00;19;05;01
Lauren Brollier Newton
I mean, what the hell am I going to teach? Think about what you would teach students when you were teaching them piano, about patience, about discipline, about music, about melody. And then ask yourself, how may I use these stories and strategies in my coaching business? Think about what you did as a mom. The hard times, the easy times.
00;19;05;01 – 00;19;26;00
Lauren Brollier Newton
How did you navigate stress? How did you navigate overwhelm? What skills do you have? Maybe you’re super organized. Maybe you could get five kids ready in the smack of time. Whatever, I don’t know, that’s not even an expression. But you see what I’m saying? What skills could you teach others that you learned through that? What stories can you tell that will help other people feel meaning?
00;19;26;03 – 00;19;51;04
Lauren Brollier Newton
What did you learn being divorced? What skills do you have in each of those that you can use? And now you’re going to put them to action. So you realized, oh, I used to teach students a great lesson about discipline. So no matter what my client has, I can use that. Now let’s take a totally different track. Let’s take the track that you were a plumber and you own a plumbing company, and you want to be a coach.
00;19;51;06 – 00;20;13;01
Lauren Brollier Newton
What did you learn about getting up and doing the do? What did you learn about customer service? What did you learn about working alongside people that you maybe didn’t like? What business skills could you teach other aspire aspiring business owners? Would you learn about hard work? These skills, they’re transferable. Yes they are. So let me leave you back with the Jacob Norby quote.
00;20;13;01 – 00;20;34;23
Lauren Brollier Newton
Let’s go back to that. You know, every once in a while when you do something and the little voice inside says, there, that’s it. That’s why you’re here. And you get a warm glow in your heart because you know it’s true. Do more of that. I love you all very much, and I’ll see you in the next episode.
00;20;34;25 – 00;21;06;02
Lauren Brollier Newton
Thanks for joining me this week on The Abundant Coach. Visit our website at Brave Thinking institute.com/coach Certification, where you can dive even deeper with additional resources and exciting opportunities. Be sure to subscribe to the show on iTunes, Spotify, or wherever you listen to your podcast so you’ll never miss an episode. And while you’re at it, if you loved the show, please rate and review to find out how to jump start your abundant coaching career and more about my journey to seven figure coach, check out our free.
00;21;06;03 – 00;21;06;27
Lauren Brollier Newton
Meant to Be a Life.
00;21;06;27 – 00;21;13;19
Lauren Brollier Newton
Coach quiz available at bti.com/coach quiz. I’ll see you in the next episode.
