3 deadly red flags to spot the right guy and save yourself the trouble of wasting time with the wrong one…
One of the BEST ways to attract the right guy…
Is to stop getting stuck with the wrong guy!
I’ve worked with women who have spent years with the wrong guy… even when something in their gut was telling them it wasn’t right.
Falling into this trap means you could be wasting your most fulfilling years on a man who’s ultimately not going to make you happy. Being with the right guy on the other hand, can build you up, make you feel full of life and make you appreciate every day with a smile on your face.
So how can you make sure the guy you’re with is the right guy and not just wasting your time?
In this article we’re going to discuss the 3 deadly red flags to watch out for that will immediately tell you if he’s worth your time and energy… or if you’ve got the wrong guy!
The 3 Deadly Red Flags Every Woman Needs To Know
- “Beauty and the Beast Disclosures” – The first red flag gets its name from the classic Disney movie, The Beauty and the Beast.
Sometimes you’ll meet a guy where he looks beautiful on the outside; tall, dark and handsome with a winning smile… But he’s actually a beast on the inside!
You can spot this if your man says things like “I’m a horrible planner” or “I have a hard time connecting to my emotions”.
A trap lots of women fall into is to think “I can change him”.
For example, a client of mine once told me she was on a second date with a guy and he said “You don’t know this about me but I’m a total a–hole”. At the time, she thought that he was just joking or hadn’t met the right woman.
But later in their relationship, he started being rude to her in front of friends and verbally abusing her. Thankfully, after my coaching, she saw her error and got out of that relationship right away!
It’s common to want to help others change for the better… But be wary of expecting him to change — even with your help.
Save yourself the struggle and meet the man who is already the right guy for you — the one who doesn’t need work or encouragement to be the best he can be for you.
- Big Praise… Big Pause – You might experience red flag number two if he’s showering you with interest, vibing with you and saying things like “you’re so special”, “so unique”. It all seems fantastic, but then suddenly… he disappears.
And then just as quickly as he disappeared, he pops back up again weeks later with some excuse like “he got really busy with work” or “he was spending time with family”.
It’s plausible enough that you might give him the benefit of the doubt… but then the cycle repeats and you’re faced with a disappearing act over and over again!
It’s a repeating pattern of not following through. Affection without follow through is like a mirage, but when you’re with a man who likes you and truly wants to be with you, he will find a way to connect with you and follow through — no matter what.
If you’re unsure whether your man is showing this red flag, an easy thing you can do is my silent movie test. Picture old silent movies for a second – even with no sound, you can identify the storyline, based purely on the behaviour of the actors.
So if you use this idea to look at your relationship, take out what he’s saying and look at how he’s behaving. Would you identify his behaviour as someone who wants to spend time with you? The right guy will always show up for you with big praise AND big presence. He will follow through with his actions.
- Therapist for Hire – Do you consistently make him feel better? Despite what a lot of women believe, this isn’t actually a good thing. You might’ve noticed red flag number three if he’s consistently stressed out or angry… until he talks to you.
Lots of women think this is sweet, but it’s worth remembering that those emotional states are where he lives most of the time… his “emotional home.” And here’s the thing, we don’t change our emotional homes from the outside. They have to change from the inside!
So if he’s constantly looking outside (to you) to make him feel better, eventually it will stop working and he will revert back to his emotional home. Unless he changes internally, nothing external will have a lasting effect on his mood.
So when thinking about this red flag, ask yourself, “What kind of emotion or energy do I want to surround myself with on a daily basis?” If his emotional state isn’t congruent with your answer, it’s time to consider moving on to the right guy.
I hope you’ve found today’s article useful!
Look out for these warning signs and you’ll quickly be able to spot the guys who aren’t worth your time.
If you believe you’re with the wrong guy, have faith and trust that you can move on and find someone who is a perfect match for you. It might seem painful or even scary, but it will pay off when you meet the man of your dreams.
And as always, if you need any help on your journey, I’m here to guide you through! Check out my Cracking The Man Code program!
Share with me in the comments before you go…
What red flags do you notice when a man is wasting your time?